j-a-h.co.uk

Kill Bill

Ohhhh, how I have to see this film.

On another note, for all the potential stalkers out there, I'm thinking of going to Sussex University if I can.

That's about all I can come up with right now. Tuesday is my full day at college and as such, I'm knackered.

It's log time!

Since the 21st of September j-a-h.co.uk has had 637 unique hits apparently.
Search engine referrals include, but not limited to; David Blane, Jonathan Ross, Absolution, revenge, "daily mail readers" idiots (I'm especially proud of that one), cyrus bolooki girlfriend and "Matt Bellamy" tall.
It must be said that most of said 637 hits were from images hosted here and posted on B3ta, but those who do read; thank you very much.

"The first sign you won't believe"

Not to mention the rest of the buggers Signs throws at you. I just saw the film, so I thought you might like to know what I thought of it.

I'm not saying that Signs is a bad film. Far from it. It's very atmospheric and downright creepy at times. Fun to watch too. The film's just a little far fetched at times. Particularly how they get rid of the aliens* and the fact said aliens just decide to pack up and never bother us again.

M. Night Shyamamamalan said he wrote the film with the intention of it being more humourous than his previous works°. He should stick to the drama. It doesn't have a great deal of humour in it. At least compared to Sixth Sense and Unbreakable.

This really needs more, so I'll just ask; was the water contaminated because it was chlorinated or because of something else?

EDIT: Maddox is right again.

*Did I really just ruin it for you? It has crop circles on the box. It doesn't take a genius to work it out really.
°I'm a sucker for special features on DVDs and I just couldn't resist watching the "Making of Signs" one. Well, most of it. *Yawns*

"Hey Laserlips! Your mama was a snowblower!"

Johnny Five is alive...

Bubble gum, or bubble glass?

My Chemistry homework today was to kick ass and chew gum!

Well, maybe not the ass kicking. I had to chew a whole pack of Hubba Bubba and then freeze it. It's not frozen yet and my jaw hurts. Ah well, with any luck it'll end up really hard, splintery and dangerous!

UPDATE: Erm, it went hard, but it's not what I'd call glass. It also unfroze about a minute after I took it out, which is weird in itself. So, not quite bubble gum and not quite bubble glass. Oh, frozen bubble gum does not in any way, shape or form taste even remotely good.

Erk!

I'd better say something. This weblog is running out of entries, and the sidebar thingy (over there --->) gets very screwed up if there isn't anything to keep it justified to the right. I should fix it but I'm just not good enough.

Right, news commentary; that's what all the cool blogs are doing nowadays ain't it? Nah, screw that, nothing good to comment on. I did find out that Jeremy Paxman does a good newsletter though. Check it out here. It's the Newsnight one, but they're all good.

I am thoroughly, utterly and completely sick of people telling me about how "it doesn't matter what order you have the letters in a word, as long as the first and last are in the right place." Yes, thank you very much Cambridge researchers for destroying the English language. I see dark times coming. I rlelay do.

UPDATE: Arrgh, it didn't fix it. Another entry vanished into the spazz while I was writing this. NB: Must make more entries so it doesn't screw up...

All about me

That is, after all, why you came here. Actually, it's probably not. Anyway, I've included my answers to a rather silly questionnaire. Now I really should be going away and doing homework, which is why I've not updated in such a long time.

three things that scare me:
01 | Being locked away from the outside world then being thrown back 20 years later.
02 | Not being able reality from what's inside my head. So close sometimes.
03 | Going outside

three people who make me laugh:
(Everyone makes me laugh. People are generally very funny)

three things i love:
01 | Reading
02 | Music
03 | Films

three things i hate:
01 | Arrogance
02 | Refusal to try and change
03 | Me

three things i don't understand:
01 | Myself (Quite egocentric, arn't I?)
02 | What 'Fake Plastic Trees' actually means
03 | -isms like sexism, racism and the others

three things on my desk:
01 | Computer
02 | Blank CDs
03 | 6 month old (empty) Diet Coke can

three things i am doing right now:
01 | Listening to music
02 | Reading BBC News
03 | Talking on MSN

three things i want to do before i die:
01 | Bungee jump
02 | Live
03 | Go on a plane

three things i can do:
01 | Half dislocate three of my fingers
02 | Tune a TV. Any TV. Rather a useless skill
03 | Procrastinate

three ways to describe my personality:
01 | Eccentric
02 | Unreliable
03 | Loyal

three ways to describe my looks:
(General lack of looks to describe)

three things i can't do:
01 | Draw
02 | Write legibly
03 | Sing

three things i say most:
01 | Indeed
02 | Heh
03 | Heheh

three of my favorite foods:
01 | Micro Noodles
02 | Pasta
03 | Fruit

three things i'd like to learn:
01 | To play an instrument
02 | Long division
03 | The back of my hand

three beverages you drink regularly:
01 | Diet Coke
02 | Water
03 | Milk

three shows you watched as a kid:
01 | Round The Twist
02 | Thunderbirds
03 | Rugrats

three websites you visit everyday:
01 | www.scaryduck.blogspot.com
02 | www.greenfairy.com
03 | BBC News

three songs youre obsessed with right now:
01 | Thoughts of a Dying Athiest - Muse
02 | Johnny B Good - Huey Lewis
03 | Magic Roundabout Remix

three movies youve recently watched:
01 | American History X
02 | Hulk
03 | LOTR: The Two Towers

three places you've lived:
01 | Manchester
02 | Banbury
03 | Bicester

three compliments youve recently recieved:
(Don't remember)

three things you should be doing, but arent:
01 | Homework
02 | Tidying
03 | Washing up

three concerts youve been to:
(Havn't been to any. Unless you count some stuff when I was very young, but that wasn't by choice)

three bands everyone should listen to:
(Everyone's differnent. What I should listen is different to what you should listen to, surely?)

three current obsessions:
(Not really obsessive. I am after Steven Fry stuff though. He be a funny man)

three things you bought this week:
(Lunch, I havn't bought anything else in a long while)

three final words of advice:
01 | The bigger they are, the harder you fall
02 | If in doubt, go with whatever won't get you arrested/shunned by the community
03 | Everyone needs a second chance

That's Dead Mean, That Is

David Blaine Flashmob

They're going to get busted by his security, says I. Arr.

Normal service may resume.

Here's something fun...

Ah, Bubblegun. Eases the pain. Well, it would if it were ever updated. Lazy good for nothing...
Anyway. This should keep who ever reads this amused. I should write something myself, but I've exhausted my supplies of the good stuff. So it's this or substandard anecdotes about trips to Tesco. If I were you (last time I checked I wasn't, but who knows what tomorrow may bring), I'd be thankful for the link.

Twin Towers

Can't spoonerise that, can you? You can, but it's crap. "Toin Twwers"? Nah.

Anyway, I'm watching that documentary on BBC2 called Towering Ambitions. Unsurprisingly, it's about the rebuilding of the WTC. They were at one point thinking about having them exactly as before, only have it as a hotel or apartment building. That's not possible, due to some contract about office space. Even so, would you want to live or even stay there? It'd be a bit morbid I think.

Anyway, how many New Yorkers found their Bin Laden with rubble on September 12th 2001? Ouch, I am going to be hated so much for that. Especially from the people who no doubt came up with it before me.

Bavid Dlane

Calling David Blane an idiot seems to be the thing all the cool kids are doing it. I've always thought his stunts were kinda really stupid. Ever since he stood on a pole for a while, he's been a hack in my eyes.

I sense a theme of lethargy in his 'stunts'. He's staying in a box, lying down, for 44 days (and nights, can't forget the nights for some reason) this time. Before he was stood on a tall column and before that he was stood in a block of ice. Not much movement there is there? Has he got a dodgy hip or something? Get a move on Dave. Why can't we see you prove human endurance by climbing Mount Everest without oxygen or walk from Land's End to John O'Groats without food. I know it must be boring inside the box, but imagine how bad it is for us, watching you, be bored, in your box, over the Thames. David Blane? You are a selfish fucker, goodbye!

Sing for Absolution

Absolution, the new Muse album, is more a collection of singles than a cohesive full album. I'm not saying that's bad. It's a great collection and it sits better with my shuffled MP3 playlist way of listening to music. Bottom line is, you're not going to gain anything from sitting down for an hour to listen to it all at once. There's no flow between tracks and some of the different styles clash with each other. For example; you have the heavy, urgent, apocalyptic rock of Stockholm Syndrome then it segways into the jangly, Gardener's World-esqueness of Falling Away. It's odd.

It's got some nice crunchy guitar work in it, some Unintended style slower stuff and even a bit of Plug In Baby guitar wankery. It's got it all. Just don't listen all at once. Space it out and you'll love it.

You didn't expect this to be a proper review did you? Good God, no.

The Comic Sans Wars

In the early 1990's a man named Vincent Connare created a font named Comic Sans. For a time it was good. People rejoiced at being to express themselves via their choice of font. Not all was well, however. Growing dissident from the Graphic Designers and Layout Artists of the world meant that the users of Comic Sans were scorned and ridiculed often taunted. This resentment continued to grow, resulting in such websites as Ban Comic Sans. This was not enough for them. They took to the streets en masse; petrol bombing and ram raiding shops and restaurants that dared to continue using the font. There was only only way to stop the horde, give them the man they wanted. Give them Vincent Connare. They butchered him like a pig and used his blood to print the last ever words in Comic Sans.
"We finally put the Sans in Comic Sans"
Well, y'know. Something like that anyway.